I know that weller isn’t a real word.

There is a great and well known hymn that contains an echo. The chorus states,

“It is well” and the echo returns “it is well.”

“What is well?” You may ask.

It is well . . . With my soul.

Several years ago this song I have sung my whole life hit me differently. My soul being well and content didn’t seem good enough. I wasn’t satisfied. I wanted more. I had caught glimpses of more- and I wanted it! There is always more, right? During this time frame, whenever this song was being sung I participated in the echo under my breath:

It is well

Make it weller

With my soul

With my soul

Make it weller

Make it weller

With my soul

The truth is, I still want my soul to be weller. I need my soul to be weller. I have been through hell and back and back again. My spirit and my whole being has spilled out in groaning prayers and tears beyond what words can express. My grief and my pain is great.

I want my soul to be weller.

I also simply want my soul to be well. Being alive is enough. I am enough. There is peace in simplicity. There can be peace in pain and uncertainty.

It is well.

It truly is well. This round of disappointment and pain has not left me depleted and hopeless. Even though it could have. Even though it should have. The sword that plunged into my heart and sought to destroy my spirit is being pulled out slowly, full of purpose and healing.

I still long for my soul to be weller. There is always more.

I also am choosing to live in gratitude and contentment and to receive peace and hope as a gift, even in the midst of the trying circumstances of life.

Both can be true: I can grapple with the longing to be weller while simultaneously embracing a soul that is joyously well, with full sincerity.

Is your soul well?

Do you want it be weller? What is keeping you from soul wellness?

Have you ever felt peace in pain? What prayers do you need to pray to receive the gift of peace? What do you need to let go of? Can you simply be silent and still?

Pray this with me as a prayer and a promise:

I’m not telling you this because I’m in need, for I have learned to be satisfied in any circumstance. I know what it means to lack, and I know what it means to experience overwhelming abundance. For I’m trained in the secret of overcoming all things, whether in fullness or in hunger. And I find that the strength of Christ’s explosive power infuses me to conquer every difficulty.

Philippians 4:11-13, TPT